NEW BLOG!

Hello Everyone!

It's been a while since I have posted anything, but I feel like it is time to end this blog and begin a new one. I have started a new blog that I am very excited about! It has a clear purpose and I'm really hoping that you all will read it!

Here is a link:
http://littledailyadventures.wordpress.com/

Please please please check it out! It would mean so much to me!

Thoughts.

I don't post much anymore. This is probably because I never make time for myself. Right now, I feel like I shouldn't even be posting and doing something else. But here I am. And I guess I really just need to get my thoughts down.

I'm happy. I really am. I am starting to come to peace with where I am at my life and who I am.

But some things still make me upset. This may sound stupid to some, but here it goes...

Last year, I had a micro usb in my phone with most of the music I've written on it. Well it got wet and now I don't know if I can retrieve those files. And it will cost me a lot of money if I can. But it makes me so angry. I am still angry at myself for not being more careful, and not transferring those files to my computer earlier. To this day, I find it very difficult to write music because I feel like everything I did in the past has disappeared and it makes me sad.

I miss music. blah.

I'm not sure why I am sharing this. I just needed to get it down somewhere concrete.

Just some thoughts that you won't really understand...

Lately I feel like I have been totally confused about my life... ever since I have been home I feel like things haven't been how I expected. I've just felt kind of down. I'm not really sure why... or what is making me feel this way. Right now I just feel kind of sad and not sure where I really belong. My hormones could be messing with me I suppose. I'm not really sure why I'm posting this... I just need to get my thoughts out in the open. And someone to talk to, but I'm not sure who or if I'd be willing to talk in the first place.

On a brighter side, I got to see some dear friends to night that I haven't seen in a long time. It was nice. =)

Wellll, maybe I will come up with a less vague post for later, but for now I bid you goodnight.

A little dip into my mind tonight...

Going to mass tonight was such a good decision. That's all I really wanna say right now. I haven't been to daily mass very much this semester because I'd always say I was too tired or had to much homework or I had something going on... Well tonight I went, and it was well worth it. I didn't know how much I missed it... not only being there with God but being there with such a wonderful community of people striving for grace. I've missed all of that and I'm sad that I've let myself drift away... well I'm coming back now. I need to make God a bigger part of my life again. He's been calling me for awhile now, It's time that I actually answer.

VENTING... kinda.

It's been a stressful few weeks.

Lots of projects, the constant struggle I have with drawing, and I've been sick which left my a little bit behind coming into this week...

I'm sitting in art history right now, and just can't get myself to focus. All I really want is sleep and to see my best friend... And to pray. But I want to feel like I have the time to pray. I feel like I don't even have time to recover from being sick, or even to breathe.

I just feel like I'm struggling with a lot right now, and need to get my life together a bit. Spring break is much needed, so my goal is to not waste it. I have only six days of class left... wait... five because today is practically over. I can do this... I can do this...

This was just kind of a venting post I suppose... Life is good, just hard, just got to keep pushing forward... =)

Music is my diary.

So I wrote a new song.... I'm not sure what I want to call it... It's some kind of prayer...

Not sure what I want to say

But I feel as though I should say something

Because honestly, I am so afraid

Instead of facing my fears, I keep running away

Chorus: And they say that time makes things better

But some things, they don’t seem to change

And I can’t help but wonder if I will ever be

The person I want to

Open my eyes

Open my eyes

Teach me how to see

Teach me how to breathe

Inhale and exhale

It’s not that simple, I regret to say

Because anxiety has got me by the neck

And I’m struggling but can’t break away

Chorus

Open my eyes

Open my eyes

Open my heart

To love like you love

See like you see

Don’t let my selfishness consume me

To love like you love

See like you see

I can’t do this alone, please help me now

Chorus

I think this song describes how I often feel sometimes... I do wonder a lot if I will ever be the person that God is calling me to be... I feel like I'm always failing and never making myself into a better person. I'm sure I don't feel alone in this... But that is why this song is a prayer I suppose... "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." I need God's help to do anything in life... and if I ever will truly become the person I'm called to be then it will be through Christ. How ironic that I'm posting/thinking about all of this right before lent. Looks like its about the perfect time of the year to actually follow through with that long list of things that I want to change about myself... 

Short blog post I suppose... but this girl has a busy life that she leads. Till next time, 

"Pray. Hope. And Don't worry."

The Little Things... and the things not so little. What I'm thankful for today.

Today has been a good day. Let me tell you why.

1. I got 8 hours of precious sleep.
2. I got my homework done around 7:30
3. I think I'm starting to understand drawing a bit more... slowly but surely.
4. I made a new friend today.
5. It was 68 degrees today... It's January!
6. It's only 9 o'clock so I have  freetime to use as I chose.
7. I have the bestest friend in the world. That isn't something exclusive to today but just thinking about that makes me happy.

Thank you God for Today. =D